dressupday's Xanga

We are the consumers of our woes

Sun, 15 Mar 2009 02:03:21 GMT

I Am

I am: yet what I am none cares or knows,
My friends forsake me like a memory lost;
I am the self-consumer of my woes,
They rise and vanish in oblivious host,
Like shades in love and death's oblivion lost;
And yet I am! and live with shadows tost

Into the nothingness of scorn and noise,
Into the living sea of waking dreams,
Where there is neither sense of life nor joys,
But the vast shipwreck of my life's esteems;
And e'en the dearest--that I loved the best--
Are strange--nay, rather stranger than the rest.

I long for scenes where man has never trod;
A place where woman never smil'd or wept;
There to abide with my creator, God,
And sleep as I in childhood sweetly slept:
Untroubling and untroubled where I lie;
The grass below--above the vaulted sky.

John Clare

This poem is terribly, terribly haunting and describes the torment John Clare went through in his days in the asylum. Many great artists and poets never made it good till the brink of mental insanity or the romanticised kiss of death; the awareness of the former must have been painful.

Sunday, February 08, 2009

Sun, 08 Feb 2009 17:39:35 GMT

To know what the problem is, to know the solution that will change everything for the better BUT not do anything about it, is a carnal sin.

So, change.

re:in:vent:ion

Sat, 17 Jan 2009 18:40:24 GMT

I wonder if one can ever be on the bad side of , well , the start of quarter life. Celebrating Chris's bday yesterday and being surrounded by people a good 6 years younger made us feel very much like older sisters crashing a party for the new 18s.

Nothing beats a reality check at a party joint.

There'll come a time when we will be barred from the club. (Tell me about it, less-than-a-decade-more-to-go.. thirrrty-five 3-5.)

The young little nieces and nephews, who are growing up far too fast, became testament time-pieces to the rate at which one is aging. How I miss.. of my youth, more so than the moments of merriment, the very mere notion of possibility.

A younger cousin told me today tt I should cease to worry too much for worry is futile and wasted on the yesteryears. As my little niece says, I am entitled to a priviledged place in the "big kids" segment.

So to speak, the best years are not gone; they are yet to come.

354musings and more

Wed, 07 Jan 2009 18:42:52 GMT

Here I am , popping a beautifully wrapped in gold foil sinful delight after 3 consecutive lindt dark chocolates and feeling quite like Bridget Jones writing her diary - only electronically.

These few days have been strange and quite so, quiet. My voice and cashmere's barks are the only noises resounding in the house.

It has been 3 days since my sis moved out to her new home and though she comes back almost every day for half-an-hour or so, I still miss her.

I miss the little bickering sessions and fighting over the television and bathroom. Now that she isnt here, winning doesnt seem all that important at all.

Drive

Sun, 23 Nov 2008 08:05:34 GMT

It is no longer me, myself and I. I am a representation of what I have come to be and will be.

Today, as I have come to learn; to play in the soil you have to be in the soil.

I dont believe in second best.

Quod me nutrit me destruit

Fri, 21 Nov 2008 20:16:49 GMT

One, a falling heart in two, the love of extremities

three, for the love four you five strikes down

two one two three

Sat, 01 Nov 2008 15:15:57 GMT

Ball peektures. Organizing the post-grad ball as a project manager was totally random but I was so glad it went pretty okay, despite a few technical glitches prior to the video showcase. The team put this whole event together in a month!

The deco: sparkly stars, a vase with a single white rose and pebbles, tea light candles and star ornaments

The fairy light backdrop that was such a beech to put up; took the boys hours but the end result was fab against the midnight blue cloth. Likened to the theme; a starry night, indeed.

Fly-away silver and gold balloons. spot them.

Reb, one of the ladies with the best dress sense ever! Always impeccably dolled up everytime I meet her; pity her dress cant be seen here! A Classic Little Black Dress.

That said, after 3 days of brain-draining examinations, I went shopping with the cousin, jo.

It was a happy, happy trip! Good food, splendid company, happy buys!

The damage:

Jurlique Classics Collection with my favourite Herbal Recovery Gel.

An Alannah Hill Dress tt is so Marc Jacobs - like ($100 discount off the rack price..just had to have it) and a Veronica Maine draw-string jacket..

Wear it on its own as a formal/classy piece but I plan to jazz it up with an Alannah Hill ribbon belt when the draw-string gets boring :)

like this...

Without the clothes' pegs of course. Ribbons are so chic;a must-have for this season!

Magazines to plan the coming shopping trips..! Where to go; what to buy!I like to plan before I go shopping so I get things done fast :>

Guess what this is...

It's a fragrance swab patch for the new ck fragrance...the norm in the industry is a sniff patch but this is totally rad!

Here's to more shopping trips to come next week!

Your love is more than enough for me

Thu, 30 Oct 2008 12:46:27 GMT

Without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him. —Hebrews 11:6

the nearness of you

Sun, 12 Oct 2008 13:23:03 GMT

I'm thinking abt you thinking abt me thinking abt you.

Reflection

Tue, 07 Oct 2008 15:25:43 GMT

Inaugural Leadership Programme for Post-Grads: Day 5 - 7

The Island, sans shopping/reception/internet/msn/any semblance of what I deem life

Team-building is key

The top bunkers!

While climbing up the top bunk, my shoe spoke, or rather, broke

Ice, ice baby

As with any camp, comes the dares.

The Mass BBQ

The bon-fire by the sea which made it chilly despite the warmth of the fire.I retired early as waking up at 7plus am daily (daylight savings included) was taking a toil on me; most definitely not a morning person.

Through the camp, I discovered a little bit more about myself via psychometric models such as the Belbin and through working in diverse, multi-cultural teams. It is strange how people thought of me as a social creature, since I tend to redraw from the world when I wish to. Sometimes, I just want time alone;this is one of those moments.

Due to the lack of a social life out of the masters circle and the ball committee which take up 95% of my time, I have been thinking a lot these days in between projects. I feel the need for change. When the time is right, I will seek a total detox. An image revamp, eating right, living right, going back to yoga, deleting what I consider negative externalities and doing everything to be the best than I can be. Not for anyone else, but myself.